Your fans have issues
by Sugarsnike
Summary: Mildly cracked fluff from 2007, left mostly as it was originally. SasukeOC


"Hello, Sir Stupid A Lot." I said while giving a mock salute to my friend. Who might that be?

Uchiha Sasuke.

Sure, I seriously **doubt** he even considers me a classmate, yet alone a friend, but I was the only one in the village who dare defy his 'greatness'. All the other girls worship him like god, and most likely have shrines too. _-Shivers-_.

He gave me a glare. Ooh._ SoooOoOoOOOOoooooOOoOOoo scary_. I'm going to die of fright. _-Snickers-_.

"I know I'm beautiful, but you don't have to stare so much~ " I said playfully, flipping back a piece of my hair. He gave a grunt and...Ooh..._what's_ _this_?

It Sir Stupid A Lot, AKA Sasuke, **Blushing**!

Wow. If I see Sakura skipping by with blue hair and chasing after an emo Naruto, I swear the world would end.

I don't hate Sakura or anything. In fact, she's one of my closest female friends. If you get past the...ugh..._Pinkness_, she is pretty smart. Too bad she hits me whenever I talk bad about Sasuke. It's sad. She would be super awesome if she died her hair blue and stopped the fangirly...ness. :/

Now back to me.

"Oi, Stupid head." I said out to Sasuke. "The Spazztic Noodle wants to go eat ramen."

The spazztic noodle is my friend Naruto. He's a spazz and he likes ramen. With are noodles. Thus the 'Spazztic noodle'. Wow. I am so great at nicknames :D

Sasuke gave a grunt. Is he being _Lazy_! **Nobody** and I MEAN **N-O-B-O-D-Y** is lazy around **Me.**

Except Shikamaru. He's always lazy.

I let out mushroom sigh. If he wouldn't come willingly, I suppose I'd have to _drag _him there. Naruto gave me strict orders.

xxx

_"Himi-chan!" The spazz- I mean, __**Naruto **__said. I turned around, looking at the weird boy. There he was. __**In. A. Not. Orange. Outfit.**_

_I basically spazzed and died._

_"AHHH HIMI-CHAN DIED!" Naruto spazzed. See? Spazztic. Out of nowhere, my body poofed away into smoke. Not long after, I came out of a nearby building. I __held an ice pack to my head._

_"HIMI-CHAN!" Naruto screamed. I twitched._

Once.

Twice.

Three times.

_Naruto stared at me weirdly before pulling me into a dark alley. Okay. I freaked._

_Naruto: SHH_

_Me: NO YOU SHH YOU LITTLE SUNUVA-_

_Naruto: HIMI-CHAN._

_Me: ...stupid noodle. _

_Naruto: ..._

_Me: ..._

_Naruto: I'm hungry. Go get Sasuke so he can pay for our ramen._

_Me: But-_

_Naruto: You can eat all you want. :D_

_"Deal."_

Annnnddd...that's the story. I stomped over to the Stupid head. If he wouldn't get up on his own, I had to...erm..._Persuade _him.

"Hey...Sasuke." I whispered in his ear. He turned to give me a look, but my face was so close to his, our noses touched. That's Eskimo kissing. O_o

"Fan. Girls."

Not long after, a loud scream of horror echoed throughout Konoha.

xxx

"Oh My Gawd! It's Sasuke-kun! o0o"

"SASUKE-KUN WE LOVE YOU! *0*"

"SASUKE-KUN! MARRY US!"

"-cough-...You DO know you aren't old enough to marry. O_o"

"...Shut up."

"Make me ;3"

"..."

Sasuke and I walked in silence for a bit. I suddenly turned to him and murmured out "Your fans have issues." Speaking of fans...

"HIMIKO-CHAN! *0*"

"HIMIKO-CHAN! WE LOVE YOU!"

"I LOVE YOU TOO~ " I called back to them.

I love my fans~

They give me stuff owo

xxx

"Sasuke-kun!" Sakura squealed as she saw him approach. That girl seriously needs to control her emotions. This is very...erm...embarrassing.

"Sakura-chan, you calm down this instant!" I scolded her in a motherly tone. She shrunk back a bit and mumbled out a low "sorry."

Me: Yes. You BETTER be sorry.

Naruto: Himi-chan...?

Me: What do you want you spazztic noodle?

Naruto: You're scaring me. ._.

Me: Bwahahahaha. Yes. FEAR MY AWESOME POWERS. 8D

Sasuke came over and smacked our heads at the same time.

"AGH SASUKE-TEME!"

"AHH THE PAIN! IMMA KILL YOU YA STUPID HEAD!"

Naruto and I both sulked off in a corner. The 'Corner of Woe'. All of a sudden, everything around us went blue and squiggly things appeared. Where did they come from? I gave an odd stare at the weird squiggly things before returning to my sulking. My head still hurt. D:

Curse you, Uchiha Sasuke.

Curse. You.

xxx

I walked behind Sasuke, glaring at his back. Oh, how I wish I could glare daggers...or lasers...or anything that could harm him to the point of death. :D

Or at least suffer a bit.

I heard a rumbling. Was it my stomach? i seriously doubt that. With all that ramen I had, I could last for a week. Or two. It grew louder.

And louder.

and _Louder_. o_o

By this point, I was freaking out. Slowly, I turned around and saw a massive amount of people running towards us. They held various signs, some making me laugh inwardly. One sign I saw said "SASUKE put the S in SEXY". No matter how much I despise the stupid head, I have to admit, it **is** true. Though he has an ego the size of Jupiter and is constantly annoying the heck out of me, he has one _fiiiiiine_body~

Okay. Himiko. CLEAR OUR HEAD OF THOSE THOUGHTS.

All better.

So, by now I figured out that the massive crowd was made of fans, both for Sasuke and I. Should I feel loved or scared?

I'm leaning toward the latter...

ANYWAYS.

"Sasuke." I said, frozen in position. He gave me an annoyed glace.

"_What_."

"Run." I stated simply before dashing off. If he follows me, so what. If he doesn't, he can be left behind for all those weirdo fans. I gotta save myself. :D

xxx

I sat at the top of the Hokage mountain, my breathing returning to the normal pace. Those fans made me run for _Hours_. It was slow, painful, and i suffered.

"Hn." I heard a voice state behind me. in my laziness, yes I said LAZINESS, I simply fell backward. My gaze moved to the face of the one and only...

Sir Stupid A Lot!

"Hello. We meet again, Sir Stupid A Lot." I said, giving another mock salute to the boy in front...erm..behind me. He gave a grunt, sitting at the edge of the mountain. I hoisted myself back into sitting position. The silence that surrounded us was awkward. But it comforted me, being the odd one I was. I turned my head to the Uchiha next to me. He probably felt my stare, seeing as he looked at me in annoyance. Did i really annoy him **that **much?

"...Sasuke?" I said meekly, using his name instead of a 'nickname'. He turned his head to me, eyes holding a questioning look. Oh. Suuure. Be lazy enough not to talk with your mouth that you have to talk with your eyes? Do you know how lazy that is? Tsk tsk tsk, Sasuke. You really **are** getting lazier. Give it another year or two and we'll have yet another Shikamaru with us! _-Groan- _Oh the flipping joy. Two lazy people. Only...One is a genius and that other is a Stupid head. :D

"...Your...**FANS** have major **ISSUES**." I said, twitching.

"Because of those..._-TWITCHTWITCH-_...**FANS** of yours, we had to run until..._-looks at watch-_...ELEVEN O'CLOCK."

"...Your fans were there too."

"ALL OF THE FEMALE POPULATION LOVE YOU."

"Most of the male population loves _you_."

"Most?"

"Naruto is obsessed with sakura, Shikamaru finds everything 'troublesome', Neji is just...Neji..."

I let out a grin.

"And what about **you**?"

His face flushed red.

Bingo.

"..." He said nothing.

I gave a grin in satisfaction. He Los-

"You do know that you said **all **of the female population is in love with me."

"...Point?"

"You're a female."

"And?"

There was no denying it. I did have a huge tiny crush on him. Who wouldn't? ;D

Sasuke deadpanned.

"Are you a...fan girl? ._." he asked, nervous of my answer.

"Are you a **fan boy**? o3o" I countered, my grin widening as his blush darkened.

"...You...have issues. -_-;"

"I love you too, Sasuke."

* * *

><p>LOL SO I WROTE THIS IS 2007 AND IT'S BEEN ON MY OLDQUIZILLA ACCOUNT AND NOW IT'S HERE BECAUSE LOOK AT IT.<p>

that is all.


End file.
